Archive for April, 2008

new addiction!!

Posted in game, life, my life on April 22, 2008 by Kaesen

p it’s been awhile since i stick to Play Station 2 at home until recently, i bought 2 game for my siblings.

but only one of them make me glued to it which is Continue reading


I got dedication!!

Posted in my life on April 21, 2008 by Kaesen

a song was dedicated to me..



cuteness overwhelm..

the songs was sang by Papams’ pretty, cute, sweet, candy nieces and she dedicated to me..

well,i’m one of them, not only me..

 Thanks Pam!!

need to be upgrade..

Posted in bodmod, life, my life on April 18, 2008 by Kaesen

well, i have piercings which is 16mm diameter earlobes and Polynesian theme tattoo on my left calf.

what should i get for the next one? hmm..

branding is not my type as is like burning through the skin to create scar but scarification is what i like..

scarification is a process where the skin was remove and let it heal up to create scar by keloids..

but to me, scarification are more beautiful if it’s large piece like the whole arms or legs or even on torso or chest..

and most likely that i can’t find a good artist in KK itself, so i must travel overseas to get it done..

which will involve more money for such beautiful art.

maybe that one will be on planning when i reach 25 or above..


today i was surfing around and i came across this Mod.Blog about this girl did a suspension with her boyfriend..

it was first time for her and second time for her guy..

here’s her story :~

The first time you suspend is like the first time you have sex; nervous beforehand, feelings of excitement and yet complete vulnerability, indecisions, and of course…pain. I’ve built up suspension in my head for so long. I’ve read a million different experiences and articles and I could barely watch a video of someone suspending without aching with jealousy. So it would obviously come to pass that I would be super excited about finally getting my chance to suspend. I saw the look on my boyfriend Josh’s face when he got down from the hooks for the first time so long ago. I saw the satisfaction in someone’s eyes when they were finally able to get off the ground in their two-point chest suspension. I wanted that. I wanted a million different things out of my suspension and I wasn’t even sure what I was in for yet. I’ve done a flesh pull once before and had an amazing time. People, places, attitudes… It just fit and I had an absolute blast. Suspensions can’t be that much harder, can they?

The familiar feeling of the needles piercing my back sent me into my first tizzy. Four hooks were finally in and it was time for a breather. I was already shaking. A little bit of energy drink to bump up my sugar a bit and it was time to lace me up to the rig. Getting off of my feet was incredibly difficult. Not just the way it screws with your head with the concept of everything, but the pain was extreme. I held tightly to Josh with my legs around him as he urged me forward and upward. I closed my eyes and tried to relax per his requests. Everything started to tingle… I wondered… was this the endorphin rush? And then it hit me; I knew that feeling. I was passing out. I forced my eyes open because I knew that nothing good could come out of passing out under these kind of extreme circumstances.

“Don’t let go… don’t let go…”

I kept saying that, panicked, looking at Josh who was standing in front me and holding my hands. I was lifted higher… higher… I started getting dizzy… and then…

“You have to let go… you have to do this alone.”

A deep breath and… I was off. My feet dangled a foot above the ground. My arms were completely immobilized, shoulders up to my ears practically with the weight of my form on the hooks. I had done it. I was suspending! J.C. and Josh were spouting things at me about how great I was doing and cheering me on but I could barely focus. And then… sweat… dizzy… intense pain. I felt like I was going to pass out another time and I tried to push it away and out of my head. Then the nausea hit, and it hit hard. It was at that point that I knew I was done.

My body had been through enough and mind-over-matter just wasn’t cutting it anymore. I whimpered for them to quickly bring me down and that I was feeling ill. Getting down from there was a terrible feeling, honestly. I hadn’t done everything I came to do. I suspended… but… I just expected more out of myself. With my overwhelmingly good response from the flesh pull, I figured that this wouldn’t be too much different. Boy was I wrong. I immediately burst into tears. They weren’t just tears of disappointment.. they were tears of pure emotion and raw… “raw me”, I guess.

OMG!! i’m so touched by their story, along with the nice experience..

there are pictures taking by the photographer which beautiful where when she burst out in tears and her boyfriends wipe it for her when she coming down from suspension with pure emotion..

go check out the pictures here..

anyway, back to my own story, I WANNA DO SUSPENSION TOO!!!! WARRGGH!!!!

unfortunely, i don’t know if there’s a team around KK here..

i would love to be part of the team..



i’m praying to at least try it once in a life time.



even though i have a normal life as much as below picture..




well, maybe i should asking my friends in Tg. Aru to see if they planning to have it here in KK or anything that i can get my ass in..


“until then, i’ll stick back to my life as usual..”

p/s – the suspension picture are from and the others are from internet source.


Posted in life, Uncategorized on April 17, 2008 by Kaesen

look at Jenny’s drawing all over the floor!! Continue reading

bloggy time!!

Posted in blog, life, my life on April 17, 2008 by Kaesen

i review back my blog and i found that mostly i blog about is question about life, meaning to it or something about it.

wtf!? Continue reading

i’ll try this tonight!!!

Posted in my life on April 16, 2008 by Kaesen

..somewhere at Papar road see if i have the luck to spot one.


ramp deer

Run by Kutless

Posted in life, my life on April 15, 2008 by Kaesen

in searching of my life greatest meaning, i happen to love this song. Continue reading